


Hockey Snacks

by TonySawicki



Series: Helena Flexes Her Wings [3]
Category: Orphan Black (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Helena continues to wingman, Sibling Bonding, even when it's not wanted
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-09-19 20:33:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17008728
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TonySawicki/pseuds/TonySawicki
Summary: Feeling restless waiting for Kira's hockey game to start, Helena takes it upon herself to select a new romantic partner for Sarah, out of the other game attendees present.





	Hockey Snacks

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! It's been a while, but here is another little ob fic, which I guess I found amusing. I hope you guys like it, too, and that everyone is having a nice holiday season. <3

The plastic bench creaked as Helena shifted her weight, craning her neck. “You are sure we’ll be able to see Kira from here?”

“I’m sure,” Sarah replied. “I know it’s farther back than we were last time, but it’s not like it’s nosebleeds.”

“No,” Helena agreed uncertainly. “Definitely not nosebleeds.”

“Besides,” Tony interjected from Helena’s other side, “I don’t think our dear sestra wants to sit down there too close to Mr. and Mrs. Sunday Brunch.”

Sitting in one of the front rows was a clear example of what people were thinking of when they said couples start to look alike after they’ve been together long enough. They might have lived on the same suburban block as Alison, and they sat there straight-backed and uptight, a cooler at their feet, no doubt filled with some healthy snack.

“It was a barbecue,” Sarah corrected him.

“Alison is often having barbecues,” Helena said.

“And that’s fine for _them_ , but it doesn’t make it my scene.”

“You don’t like to attend?” Helena asked. Barbecues at the Hendrix household were a fairly common event, and while she hadn’t exactly thought that Sarah _enjoyed_ them per se, she also hadn’t considered that she disliked them so strongly.

“Look, it’s different with Alison,” Sarah said. “She’s family. _Those_ lot,” she gestured to the couple, all unruffled blonde haircuts and zippered fleece, “are just twats.”

Tony leaned closer to whisper, “They pissed her off ‘cause they wanted her for a threesome.”

Helena looked back to Sarah, saw her disgusted little shiver.

“They’re not my type, yeah?”

Tony laughed, propping one boot up on the bench in front of them.

“I still feel like I cannot see anything,” Helena said.

“No one’s even out on the ice yet,” Sarah said. “Our seats are fine.”

Helena slumped slightly, feeling restless on the uncomfortable plastic bench, doing nothing but waiting for the game to start.

“You might have gone for it, just for the husband,” Tony said, head cocked as he considered the couple again. “He’s not bad-looking, if a little buttoned-up.”

“Ugh,” Sarah said, and shook her head vehemently. “Not a chance.”

Helena perked up, seeing an opportunity to keep herself busy. “I will find someone else then who is more to your type!”

“What? No, that’s not necessary.”

Helena ignored her, already scanning the stands for someone she thought matched with Sarah’s style.

Her gaze paused on a man two rows in front of them and a ways to the right. He had two earrings in his left ear and looked like he’d forgotten to shave the past few days. There was a ruggedness to him that Helena figured went well with Sarah.

“How about him?” Helena nodded towards her find. 

“Him?” Sarah wrinkled her nose. “Isn’t that Mackenzie’s dad?”

Helena shrugged. “He has good masculine qualities.”

“Not interested,” Sarah said, raking a hand back through her hair.

“No? He’s hot,” Tony said, scratching at his jaw.

Sarah just made a face, so Helena moved on. She turned to look behind them and picked out someone else—a nice, soft-looking fellow in a sweater. He might have been on the tidy end of things for Sarah, but Helena could see him appealing to her gentler side. She elbowed Sarah, looking meaningfully over her shoulder.

Sarah glanced and then scoffed. “That’s the Tanakas!”

Helena looked again. She hadn’t even noticed the woman who was presumably the man’s wife seated by him. “This is problem?”

“I’m not going to crash someone’s marriage,” Sarah said. “Even if I had reason to think they were interested—which I don’t—I’m not trying to complicate anyone’s established relationship.”

Helena nodded. “Singles only.”

“No, not anyone!”

But Helena had already picked her next potential. “Here, look. That one is a nice boy in the denim vests.” She pointed discreetly to a young-looking dad with a mohawk and a lip ring. He had warm brown skin and was pulling a water bottle out of his black backpack, which had a “The Clash” patch sewn onto it.

“That one looks good,” Tony chimed in helpfully.

Just then, the kids started filing onto the ice, and everyone in the stands’ attention shifted, people standing up and cheering loudly.

“I don’t want to be set up with parents from Kira’s team, okay? Just drop it,” Sarah rumbled as they sat back down.

“I do!” Tony said. “Think you could get me Mohawk’s number?”

“I am not searching for you right now, brat,” Helena said.

“Why not?” Tony demanded. “You never want to find me someone.”

“What, you really want her to set you up with a hockey dad?” Sarah raised her eyebrows.

“Sestra, if the hockey fathers are not for you, I have seen many women practicing figure skating here as well,” Helena suggested then. “Perhaps after Cal you are wanting a more feminine energy.”

“Not really looking at all, Meathead.”

“I could take feminine energy,” Tony said. “Or not. I’m good with either one.”

Helena stubbornly ignored him, and changed the subject. “How can we know which one is Kira?”

“By her number. It’s 63, just like it has been every other game,” Tony said.

“I don’t see 63…”

“She’s not even in right now,” Tony said. “ _Hey_.”

Helena turned towards him and found a surprisingly genuine hurt in his eyes.

“Why are you blowing me off?” he asked, frowning.

Helena sighed. “I have told you. I already have someone in mind for you.”

“Then how come you still haven’t introduced me?” Tony said. “Will you at least tell me something about them?”

Helena pressed her lips together. She wasn’t trying to upset Tony, and it stirred something uncomfortable within her to see him frowning at her like that, but she didn’t really think he was ready for the setup she wanted for him. He would be, eventually.

“OY, KIRA! Don’t take any shit from the other team! Knock their teeth out!!” came a loud and startling shout behind them, and all three clones turned to see Felix making his way down through the bleachers towards them. “What?” he asked, as they stared.

“She’s not in the game right now,” Helena informed him. “No 63.”

“Oh,” Felix said. He shrugged and plopped down next to Sarah. “Well, how was I supposed to know?”

One of the coaches was turned towards them, giving Felix a particularly dirty look, and he made a rude gesture back, causing her to turn away in indignation. 

“What’s her problem?” Felix said.

“It is the wrong kind of cheering,” Helena said.

“It isn’t!” Felix said defensively. “That’s what hockey’s all about!”

Sarah shook her head. “I got lectured about it last week. Said my language was ‘too colorful’ for kids’ hockey.”

“Well, that’s just ridiculous,” Felix sniffed. “Kids love colors.”

On Helena’s other side, Tony snorted and she let out a quiet sigh of relief that his frustration with her was, for the moment at least, forgotten.

“I brought snacks,” Felix said, reaching into his bag for them.

“Yeah, Helena was trying to point out all the snacks already here before you showed up,” Sarah muttered.

Helena looked blankly at her. “I was not pointing at snacks.” She turned in surprise at the stifled sound Tony made beside her. “What! When did I do this?”

“She means your tryin’ to find her a date,” Tony said. “The dudes are the snacks.”

Helena’s mouth formed a little “o” as she understood his meaning. She nodded knowingly. “I see. Because they are so edible.”

“Yeah, right,” Tony said. “That Mr. Tanaka is one edible arrangement, am I right?” He leaned over Helena, towards Sarah, waggling his eyebrows, and she pushed him away, though she was clearly trying not to laugh.

“Piss off,” she said.

“I feel like I’ve missed out on all the fun,” Felix said, looking between them.

“Well, we’ve formed a bond,” Tony said. “You came to more games maybe you’d get in on that.”

Felix put a hand to his scarf, shocked and offended. “I come to as many as I can. You’re forming a special bond with _my_ sister, over hockey, and you think I’ll be left out of it?” He tossed his head. “As if I need any more bonds with her. Besides I’ve only missed _two_ games.”

“Three,” Tony said.

Felix whipped around to look at him again. “Two!” He leaned forward slightly. “Why, how many have _you_ missed?”

Tony grinned, held up his hand, forming a circle with his thumb and fingers. “That’s a big zero.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“’s’true,” Tony said with a cocky shrug. “That’s how I know _you_ have missed _three_ games.”

Felix looked at Sarah, perhaps hoping for backup, but she raised her hands in front of her. “He hasn’t missed a game. And he’s right.” She grimaced. “You’ve missed three.”

Tony let out a triumphant cackle.

“Not like it’s a big deal,” Sarah said placatingly. “I’m thrilled you can come at all, you know monkey is, too.”

“Some of us just have things to do,” Felix said. “Besides, I’m still here more than most of the gang. How many games do you see Cosima at?”

“She’s not even in the country half the time,” Tony said, rolling his eyes. “Way to target someone who isn’t here to defend herself.”

They carried on bickering while Helena watched a small figure wearing a number 63 glide out into place on the ice. She beamed as she watched the game, pleased that things were progressing just as she’d intended.


End file.
